Dating for depressed people
For example, you might decide to give it three more months.
If your loved one has not sought or begun treatment by then, or has not improved despite treatment, or refuses to follow treatment recommendations as instructed, only then will you allow yourself to walk away. Sometime depressed people may use drugs or alcohol.
And because deep connections take time to develop, I’ve only had a few serious romantic relationships. And more often than not, I don’t feel a connection with him and have a really hard time faking it for the rest of the date. And I usually date extroverts, so this works out fine — they’re always willing to chatter away!
They probably went on a little longer than they should have, but this allowed me time to reflect and think (I don’t know if I’ve ever gone without reflecting and thinking! Now, after two years of being single, I constantly waver between thoughts of “I know exactly what makes me happy in a relationship and I will be patient” and “I will be alone forever (sigh).” All of my (few) friends are married, and I often look at their relationships, trying to figure out what they did differently and why I’m not coupled up like they are. Another reason I hold back is because I can go from zero to deep in about two seconds.
A therapist may be able to provide perspective that neither of you can manage on your own.
You may find that, despite depression, the relationship is worth saving.
No one wants to be accused of abandoning a loved one at their time of greatest need.
But neither should you remain in a strained relationship with no conceivable future out of a sense of duty or guilt.
Like most INFPs I know, my relationships are based on forming deep connections. I know this about myself: I have to find an authentic connection with my date, otherwise, I’m done. Instead of blabbing on and on about myself, I would much rather listen and observe my date so I can get a sense of who he is and feel comfortable with him.Finally, if you’ve tried everything and your relationship seems hopeless, or worse — toxic — it may really be time to walk away.Try to make your partner understand that you still care.Otherwise you may be consumed by guilt or self-doubt, wondering if you did all you could do for your partner — and your relationship.You are not the cause of your partner’s depression.